The Muses

The ancient Greeks believed that artists were guided by a group of beautiful spirits called the Muses. They led the poet and the singer down the path of creativity toward their creations. I think there’s something to that. After all where do these ideas come from that end up giving us stories and songs and poetry?

I believe I have two muses. One with silky long black hair and a smile that sparkles brighter than the morning star. She whispers in my ear. Her breath sends shivers of pleasure through my entire body. She sings and points to things of beauty that I otherwise may not have noticed.

Her rival is a rather gabby individual. Her hair is also black and shiny but is tied back tight and ends in a pony tail that bounces and snaps like a whip when she moves her head. She doesn't sparkle, she pops. Constantly talking and jabbering and tossing ideas into my brain pot at such a rate that I can barely digest one before the next comes barreling in. Perky is a word that might describe her…. or caffeinated.

Mercifully the two seldom appear at the same time. They are rather abrasive toward one another when they are together. The poetess starts making vulgar rhymes and the perky one ends up slapping her.

But they are both very hot. They are sultry and sexy and drive me crazy. And I quite enjoy both of their company.

Does that make me a polygamist?

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The Muses

The ancient Greeks believed that artists were guided by a group of beautiful spirits called the Muses. They led the poet and the singer down the path of creativity toward their creations. I think there’s something to that. After all where do these ideas come from that end up giving us stories and songs and poetry?

I believe I have two muses. One with silky long black hair and a smile that sparkles brighter than the morning star whispers in my ear. Her breath leaves sends shivers of pleasure through my entire body. She sings and points to things of beauty that I otherwise may not have noticed.

Her rival is a rather gabby individual. Her hair is also black and shiny but is tied back tight and ends in a pony tail that bounces and snaps like a whip when she moves her head. She doesn't sparkle, she pops. Constantly talking and jabbering and tossing ideas into my brain pot at such a rate that I can barely digest one before the next comes barreling in. Perky is a word that might describe her…. or caffeinated.

Mercifully the two seldom appear at the same time. They are rather abrasive toward one another when they are together. The poetess starts making vulgar rhymes and the perky one ends up slapping her.

But they are both very hot. They are sultry and sexy and drive me crazy. And I quite enjoy both of their company.

Does that make me a polygamist?

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Basil’s Word Search

 

Hey!

Check out this free word search based on my books and podcasts.

If you listened to the podcast you will recognize most of the names and places. Enjoy!

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Basil’s Word Search

 

Hey!

Check out this free word search based on my books and podcasts.

If you listened to the podcast you will recognize most of the names and places. Enjoy!

Sphere: Related Content

Pork…and other forbidden fruits

Some days I feel like eating pork. You know, a delicious slice or two of bacon, or maple and sage sausage.  Maybe even a thick juicy pork chop.

But then, I remember I will probably die if I eat pork. No, I am not Kosher or whatever the Muslim version of Kosher is. I am just allergic to pork. While it probably won’t kill me, it will make me wish I was dead. And the smells emanating from my body after ingesting it will likely make anyone within fifty feet of me think I am dead and just haven’t realized I am decomposing.

It has probably always been that way for me, even though I loved bacon and ham as a kid and didn’t know it was slowly killing me. I ate it all the time. Bacon, pork chops, beans and ham, pork sausage. I should have guessed early on when my mother always complained about how rude I was for passing gas as much as I did. But hey, she kept feeding me the poison!

It wasn’t until my appendix was taken out that I realized all the intestinal issues I had as a kid was because I was allergic to pork. The first time I ate pork after recovering from surgery my wife had made a really delicious Korean spicy pork bacon dish that I always loved before. I endured the most violent cramps you can imagine. PMS on steroids for men. I thought my appendix had come back into my body like Freddy Krueger returning from Hell. It nearly put me back in the hospital.

I don’t know if anyone else has ever experienced that kind of symptom from pork after an appendectomy. It was a real shock to me. If it is a regular medical occurrence I have yet to meet the rest of the victims. When I mention it to other people they are quite surprised to hear that. Except of course for my Jewish friends who just say “Of course, the prohibition of pork wouldn’t be in the Torah if there weren’t truth behind it.”

Now I do still eat other non-Kosher foods. Shell fish like shrimp and lobster and scallops and catfish and octopus and so on. But I will say this, I do not enjoy them as much as I used to. I don’t know what it is, but all of that kind of food just…I don’t know…tastes funny. And it makes my burps taste funny too. Funny in a bad sort of way.

So, what does my allergy to pig flesh and recent aversion to shellfish and bottom feeders have to do with my books or politics or news or anything I normally bring up?

Well… I’m not sure. Except that sometimes the thing we think we may be naturally drawn to, the thing we are fed all of our lives under the guise of normal food by our parents and even our spouses may not always be what we are actually meant to consume.

Maybe I need to reconsider my career as an IT Specialist. After all, when I am in the office I regularly spend a good portion of my work day sneezing and blowing my nose…just like an allergic reaction.

Hmmm. Perhaps I should just jump on over to what seems more natural to me.  Writing and telling stories and acting like a silly person on my talk show don’t give me allergic reactions.

Something to ponder.

If what you do makes you fart like a brute beast, or it if makes you sneeze like hyper-allergenic cat groomer maybe you should reconsider your path.

Just thinking out loud here.

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Same ol’ Same ol’

I really don't like to be seen as derivative, but I also realise that there is little likelihood someone could write something in the same manner or style as I do or I, they unless I really try...ie cheat.

My problem is that my dislike of derivation, commonality, normalcy, repetition etc has led me into a quandary. I am in the middle of the last book of a loosely connected series and find that I am beating myself up trying not to sound derivative of my own previous works. The other three books had surprises and events that made people keep turning the page (actually they've only been released in podcast audio, so they just kept listening as I turned the page). In this one the characters feel too familiar, too transparent.

Maybe it is just me. Maybe I have grown too close to these characters and like a bad case of visiting relatives too long have tired of hanging out with them.

Or maybe it is the fact that I have only seen ten hours of sunlight in two weeks and it is flippin' cold and I am wishing I had the cash to take a vacation but my agent still hasn't sold the previous three books I wrote so I am feeling like I am spinning my wheels late on a Sunday night and just plain feeling whiny at a time when no one wants to hear me whine even though just yesterday I had a few hundred people laughing when I did my talk show but now can't even get a simple plot in a simple thriller novel to make sense or even keep the tempo and now I just feel like crawling under my chair and eating those little cheesecake niblet thingies my son brought home yesterday from his job at the fancy Italian restaurant that I can't afford to eat at but don't want to eat right now anyway because I have a serious issue with run-on sentences and can't even figure out where to put the punctuation in this one.

Sigh...I'm going outside to make snow angles.

yeah...angles...they're easier than angels...you just lay there in a half fetal position in the snow.

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Same ol’ Same ol’

I really don't like to be seen as derivative, but I also realise that there is little likelihood someone could write something in the same manner or style as I do or I, they unless I really try...ie cheat.

My problem is that my dislike of derivation, commonality, normalcy, repetition etc has led me into a quandry. I am in the middle of the last book of a loosely connected series and find that I am beating myself up trying not to sound derivative of my own previous works. The other three books had surprises and events that made people keep turning the page (actually they've only been released in podcast audio, so they just kept listening as I turned the page). In this one the characters feel too familiar, too transparent.

Maybe it is just me. Maybe I have grown too close to these characters and like a bad case of visiting relatives too long have tired of hanging out with them.

Or maybe it is the fact that I have only seen ten hours of sunlight in two weeks and it is flippin' cold and I am wishing I had the cash to take a vacation but my agent still hasn't sold the previous three books I wrote so I am feeling like I am spinning my wheels late on a Sunday night and just plain feeling whiny at a time when no one wants to hear me whine even though just yesterday I had a few hundred people laughing when I did my talk show but now can't even get a simple plot in a simple thriller novel seem to make sense or even keep the tempo and now I just feel like crawling under my chair and eating those little cheesecake niblet thingies my son brought home yesterday from his job at the fancy Italian restaurant that I can't afford to eat at but don't want to eat right now anyway because I have a serious issue with run-on sentences and can't even figure out where to put the punctuation in this one.

Sigh...I'm going outside to make snow angles.

yeah...angles...they're easier angels...you just lay there in a half fetal position in the snow.

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Back from the Shadows!

Well, it’s been a couple weeks since my last blog post. The holiday’s are a very busy time of course but that is no excuse for hiding away like that.  Well, OK, they actually are an excuse…and one I will use with diligence and care. Anyway….news keeps on moving regardless. Here are a few of the headline stories  worthy of blogging as we close out 2009

Item 1

IRAN

As much as the news media keeps beaming stories of Iranian freedom demonstrations I think they are really missing the facts. Who is behind these demonstrations? Is it really western ideals of egalitarin freedom? No, it is actually a different Ayatollah who’s been made rich by tricky business dealings with the outside world that got around the thirty year old sanctions since the “Revolution'” took over. It is not the revolt of the democracy loving, pro-western educated classes against the despotic regimie of Khamenei and Ahmadenijad. It is rather one set of despotic rich rulers fighting another set of equally despotic rich rulers for control of the cash and power of Iran. No matter who wins in this case know this USA and pro-western democracies….you still suck in their eyes!

Item 2

CLIMATE CHANGE

Nothing much has changed here, except the conference is now over, the hypocrites are pretending all the more that there really is a global warming trend caused by man instead of that crazy concept known as ‘weather”, and snow and ice storms are still ravaging much of North America in spite of the ‘fact’ of global warming. It is getting so warm it feels like it is getting cold, but really it is warm….really….it is so….now shut up and pay your carbon credits you worthless little anti-big brother-progress realist.

item 3

Security and Terrorists

No matter how much any one may wish to put their head in the sand, there are bad guys trying  reeeeeeaally hard to kill us all. they are called terrorists, and it is only a matter of time before one gets through.The Christmas day flight scare on the way to Detroit is a case in point. I am fairly certain that guy was not really expected to succeed by his superiors. I think he was just sent to test the system. If it was intended as a full on attack I am pretty certain there would have been a number of simultaneous attempts.

This is not to say that the passengers, especially that Dutch fellow who jumped the would be bomber, were not truly brave in their attampt to stop him.They were. Their fast thinking  probably saved a whole lot of lives. But I am fairly certain that the bad guys are simply honing their skills and trying a few different methods.

One of these days we will see another 9-11, but bigger. It will probably be multi-continental and it will definitely be brutal. We have no choice but to continue being vigilant, and to keep the fight on their soil. Don’t be fooled, they won’t be giving up anytime soon.

To quote an old military axiom:

STAY ALERT, STAY ALIVE!

 

On that note, I am still going to go downtown in Anchorage on New Years Eve and watch the fire jugglers and dancers and listen to music, and see the pyrotechnics and have a generally great time with my wife and kids. Then off to church for out New Years service.

In light of that I bid you all a happy new year and many blessings for the months to come!

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Back from the Shadows!

Well, it’s been a couple weeks since my last blog post. The holiday’s are a very busy time of course but that is no excuse for hiding away like that.  Well, OK, they actually are an excuse…and one I will use with diligence and care. Anyway….news keeps on moving regardless. Here are a few of the headline stories  worthy of blogging as we close out 2009

Item 1

IRAN

As much as the new media keeps beaming stories of Iranian freedom demonstrations I think they are really missing the facts. Who is behind these demonstrations? Is it really western ideals of egalitarin freedom? No, it is actually a different Ayatollah who’s been made rich by tricky business dealings with the outside world that got around the thirty year old sanctions since the “Revolution'” took over. It is not the revolt of the democracy loving, pro-western educated classes against the despotic regimie of Khamenei and Ahmadenijad. It is rather one set of despotic rich rulers fighting another set of equally despotic rich rulers for control of the cash and power of Iran. No matter who wins in this case know this USA and pro-western democracies….you still suck in their eyes!

Item 2

CLIMATE CHANGE

Nothing much has changed here, except the conference is now over, the hypocrites are pretending all the more that there really is a global warming trend caused by man instead of that crazy concept known as ‘weather”, and snow and ice storms are still ravaging much of North America in spite of the ‘fact’ of global warming. It is getting so warm it feels like it is getting cold, but really it is warm….really….it is so….now shut up and pay your carbon credits you worthless little anti-big brother-progress realist.

item 3

Security and Terrorists

No matter how much any one may wish to put their head in the sand, there are bad guys trying  reeeeeeaally hard to kill us all. they are called terrorists, and it is only a matter of time before one gets through.The Christmas day flight scare on the way to Detroit is a case in point. I am fairly certain that guy was not really expected to succeed by his superiors. I think he was just sent to test the system. If it was intended as a full on attack I am pretty certain there would have been a number of simultaneous attempts.

This is not to say that the passengers, especially that Dutch fellow who jumped the would be bomber, were not truly brave in their attampt to stop him.They were. Their fast thinking  probably saved a whole lot of lives. But I am fairly certain that the bad guys are simply honing their skills and trying a few different methods.

One of these days we will see another 9-11, but bigger. It will probably be multi-continental and it will definitely be brutal. We have no choice but to continue being vigilant, and to keep the fight on their soil. Don’t be fooled, they won’t be giving up anytime soon.

To quote an old military axiom:

STAY ALERT, STAY ALIVE!

 

On that note, I am still going to go downtown in Anchorage on New Years Eve and watch the fire jugglers and dancers and listen to music, and see the pyrotechnics and have a generally great time with my wife and kids. Then off to church for out New Years service.

In light of that I bid you all a happy new year and many blessings for the months to come!

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ALASKA STORIES WANTED

Have you got an Alaskan story you’d like to share? I want to hear it.

My talk show, Basil’s Alaska Weekly News Review is looking for stories and people to tell them about experiences related to Alaska. When they are adventurous, funny, serious, heartfelt, cutsie, or downright strange I want to hear it.

Every week on the Saturday show the last half hour will be dedicated to Alaska stories as told by people who are or were here or by those who can relate the story. We can tell them live on the air, or it’s longer than a few minutes call it can be pre-recorded or scheduled to make sure you get the full time you need to tell it right. If you are uncomfortable being on the air but want to share your story, write it out and send it in to the email address below.

So get out your hunting, fishing, hiking, backwoods living, ALCAN roadtrip, growing up in Alaska stories and share them with the show. If you need more information drop a comment to this blog or email me at basil @ basilsands . com.

I look forward to hearing from you.

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Climate Change Mind Control Ray

As I stated in my previous blog entry I am increasingly of the mind that the Copenhagen Climate Change Conference is actually a meeting of Dr. Evil Wannabes bent on taking over the world.  They are meeting with their evil henchmen and dancing the night away with fembot cyborgs designed for the genetically discerning nerd.

I think this conference is a dual purpose meeting of sorts.

Purpose #1: Mind control of the world. These diplomats and fame hungry scientists have come up with a cracked idea to control the population of the nations by forcing us into a system that makes countries pay up for progress.

“Want to get out of the Stone Age? Pay the Climate Troll.”

Already out of the stone age? Then you owe big mister.

As proof of my theory that mind-control by evil overlords is  a primary motivating factor check out the attempt at mass global hypnosis a couple of days ago.

Thousands of Norwegians stared in terror in the night sky Tuesday night as the Dr. Evil’s attempted the first part of their evil plan for world domination. But of course, like all evil dominion plans things did not go as planned. In this case, a henchmen apparently spilled his hot cocoa into the rocket fuel and it did not have the umph to get into the upper atmosphere where everyone in the northern hemisphere would have been drawn into it’s mesmerizing swirliness.

The Russian’s of course claim that it was actually a failed missile test in the Arctic Ocean north of Norway. Yeah Right!  I’ve seen that swirly pattern before, and it didn’t work out well for the those people in that episode of twilight zone.

As further proof of my point, after receiving his Nobel Prize in Oslo Norway President Obama immediately left, skipping the traditional dinner with the Nobel Prize committee. The Norwegians were rather miffed by the snub. Why would Barack Obama, a narcissists narcissist, skip out on a major dinner in his honor?

Simple.

He expected to find them in  a glassy eyed hypnotic state where he could control the conversation and program their minds to turn them into his very own army of minion henchmen and sexy blond fembots. Instead he finds a group of coherent scientists, diplomats and professors who want to talk science. And the fembots….well they were not what he expected…and man can Michelle slap when she’s jealous. (should’s learned from Tiger, dude)

Speaking of fembots.

Purpose #2: getting chicks. That’s right. Think about it. A bunch of science nerds and guys that look like Al Gore. Getting together in cold wet Denmark to talk about shrinkage caused by being in heat too long. What kind of chicks attend meetings like that?

1. The Cheryl Crow’s of the world, who advocate saving the climate by using only a single piece of toilet paper per visit to the WC. Scientist, being obsessive compulsives by nature, are afraid to touch chicks like Cheryl, therefore:

2. FEMBOTS: Programmed to please and totally sanitary. And they’ll never tell on you.

(Lesson for golfers, hang out with scientists and you won’t have to worry about getting caught. … “What honey? It’s not a real woman, more like a microwave with legs.”)

So, Dr Evil’s of the world, we know what you are doing over there.  You will fail….
because I know how to reprogram the Fembots chichi-guns!

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The Evil Dr. Chill, Climate Control Dark Overlord in Copenhagen

Currently I am looking out my office window and experiencing a strange Alaskan day weatherwise. It is both brightly sunny and blindly foggy. At the same time.

It adds a kind of surreal feeling to the day. To look out and see a mile of brightly lit ground, parking lot, runway, highway, but to be totally surrounded by dense fog that blocks out the blue horizon and distant Denali (Mt. McKinley). The local Chugach mountains are quite visible, but right behind them a smooth grey/white wall of mist hangs like a blanket till it dissipates into the blue above. Hmmm. it’s like being in a Stephen King novel. We are in a bubble. It looks just enough like the real world that most people will not question it, because most people don’t go far out of town this time of year. They won’t notice till spring that w e have been captured inside a bubble and are slowly being transported to the secret underground lair of the Dark Overlord of Climate Control, the Evil Dr. Chill where slowly but surely the earth will be cooled and humans put into a Lilliputian time warp prison existence where we only get to come to the surface once in a thousand years for one day to reduce our Carbon Footprint. But his real plan is to chill the earth to the point that his asexual mind control cybots can operate without overheating their core circuits.

It cannot be just a coincidence that the Copenhagen Climate Change Overlords and their minions are meeting at the same time. Their plot is being hatched as we speak.  Life on earth will never be the same. We Are DOOMED! DOOMED! DOOMED! DOOmed! DOomed! Doomed! doomed! doo…  doo…

Did I mention I slept in the snow at my son’s boy scout camp over the weekend. Yes, on the ground, in the snow…it was 20 degrees below freezing. Global warming was nowhere to be found…it was freakin’ cold!!

Curse you Dr. Chill, curse you!

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See This Movie!!

I don’t watch too many movies, at least not compared to many people. When I do watch movies, I want them to be good. I have now found what I will probably consider the top contender for my movie of the year award.

RED CLIFF
http://www.redclifffilm.com/
I love historical fiction and have a particular thing for Chinese and Korean epics. Don’t know why, but they grab me. Among the greats I have enjoyed are Musa, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Hero, Yom Ge So Mun (Korean tv series), Tae Guk Ki, and The Road Home ( I know it was a love story, but hey it was good).

But my new absolute favourite is Red Cliff, by John Wu. Dang!

Big action, real heros, historical feeling, incredible plot twists, believable story. This was not fantasy, it was like my dream of what the time was. At the moment I am in the early stage of writing a historical fiction set in a similar time as this movie. And I will say that this film has injected itself into my thoughts and the images that will end up on the page of my own work in the future.

This movie made my heart thump and my knuckles clench the couch. It made the new 50” plasma & surround sound system worth every penny.

SEE IT!

Other movies I have seen and liked this year ( they are not necessarily new) include the following:

1. District 9 – wow, good stuff
2. Spirited Away – Anime that kept my full attention
3. Metropolis – Ok, I was on an Anime kick – but it was good
4. Madea goes to Jail – I laughed myself silly

But Red Cliff is definitely my personal favourite for 2009

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See This Movie!!

I don’t watch too many movies, at least not compared to many people. When I do watch movies, I want them to be good. I have now found what I will probably consider the top contender for my movie of the year award.

RED CLIFF
http://www.redclifffilm.com/
This movie made my heart thump and my knuckles clench the couch. It made the new 50” plasma & surround sound system worth every penny.

 

Other movies I have seen and liked this year ( they are not necessarily new) include the following:

1. District 9 – wow, good stuff
2. Spirited Away – Anime that kept my full attention
3. Metropolis – Ok, I was on an Anime kick – but it was good
4. Madea goes to Jail – I laughed myself silly

But Red Cliff is definitely my personal favourite for 2009

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Talkshow Name Contest Extended!

Due to my own tardiness at getting the word out I have extended the contest to name my new talkshow by one month. You now have until December 31st to put in your suggestion. Here's the details.

I am starting a new radio talk show on www.blogtalkradio.com starting in December and am enlisting the help of my faithful audiobook listeners to name the show.

The show covers Current Events, Politics, Sports and Entertainment presented against a humorous backdrop of live talk mixed with occasional skits and coming from  a fairly conservative viewpoint from America’s northern frontier state of Alaska.

It is guaranteed to be informative, sometimes serious, generally fun and at times downright silly of the Kharzai Ghiassi school of silliness (listen to Karl’s Last Flight or Faithful Warrior and you will know that means).
The title needs to reflect that the show comes from Alaska, is a general information/entertainment show, and sound intelligent when spoken aloud.

If your suggestion is chosen you will receive $25 USD to Paypal  or Amazon.com.

To submit your Title by commenting to this post or use this Contact Page with the subject “Radio Title”.  You have until  December 31st to submit.

I look forward to what you come up with.

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