Thursday, October 8, 2009

I can survive/fix/fight my way out of anything

Over on the Kill Zone blog Michelle Gagnon brought up the subject of things authors write into books that are just unrealistic in order to keep the protagonist in the game. You know, those just in time salvation things that enable them to escape, beat the bad guys, rescue the damsel in distress, or puppy in a creek, or whatever.

Well I just got out of my truck and realized that it is a haven of just that sort of unrealistic clunky plot devices. I checked around and discovered the following in my little ol' F250 Crew Cab:

1. running shoes in my gym bag
2. a military wool blanket
3. a rain poncho
4. a backpack
5. two knit caps
6. a baseball cap
7. about fifty feet of parachute chord
8. an extra pair of glasses
9. a folding shovel
10. enough tools to do most of whatever I'd need to do
11. two pairs of thick wool socks
12. a K-Bar combat knife
13. a Gerber hatchet
14. a first aid kit
15. a whistle
16. a compass
17. a set of maps covering most of southcentral alaska
18. a case of water bottles.
19. a FRS radio / walkie talkie
20. a shortwave radio
21. a flashlight
22. two different multi-plyer tools
23. mosquito repellent
24. a magnesium fire starter
25. a long stemmed lighter
26. a wad of steel wool (makes good tinder)
27. numerous straps, bungees, and zip ties
28. two MRE meal packs
29. a canteen on a web belt
30. a 20x20 blue tarp
31. two rolls of duct tape (one black, one silver)
32. Four pairs of gloves (only three pairs that match though)
33. a candy bar and four packs of gum
34. a canned air-horn
35. a .38 revolver and ammo
36. a chapstick

Most of it was within arms reach from the drivers seat'd think I lived in Alaska....or a war zone

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  1. Macgyver's dream truck and contents. Nice.

  2. Loved the post. Your truck sounds a lot like my office (people have ventured in and never been seen again), or the trunk of one of my cars.

    Everything for starting a fire, but no axe? Hope there's enough dry small stuff available.

    Don't go shootin' any brownies with that popgun or you'll make him angry. Good for other varmints (and tax men) though.

    Of course, the duct tape will fix anything and you could tape the bear's mouth closed. But if you just want to keep bears away, take along a rap cd. That will keep just about anything away. Failing that, bagpipe music will keep away anything except a Scotsman or Irishman (music from Heaven, laddie).

    War zone / Alaska? War zone might be easier. You can pick equipment off dead enemy troops.

  3. Well I didn't have an axe but I do have a hatchet, a really sharp one. :D

    And I agree with the bagpipes. It'll drive away all but those I wouldn't mind having around.